What’s Really Keeping Us Apart?

My youngest (9) has a mind for computers. He just “gets” them. He might just be the only kid I knew genuinely excited for online learning. Virtual field trips are his jam! And lately, he’s been spending a lot of time working on coding or writing his own program. When he sits down to explain to me what he has done, I’m often quite lost but nod along because I’m a good mom. But here’s what I do know: he has figured out the relationship between cause and effect.

In other words, he knows that things don’t just accidently happen when he codes. If something is happening that the doesn’t want to happen, he has to trace it back to the cause. Perhaps he wrote some code wrong. Maybe he left out something important. But whatever the issue, he recognizes that the effect he is experiencing has had a cause.

This cause-and-effect scenario carries over into the ministry world as well. When we look at things like the Generation Gap or age segregation in our churches or the loss of generational discipleship or lack of generativity between generations, we can assume correctly that these effects have a cause, something that caused and/or perpetuated the situation.

Not a whole lot of research has been done regarding age segregation in the church (reporting on it, analyzing it…yes, but actual research, not as much). Yet it is not hard for us to see that in many churches, generations are not given space to connect with each other in meaningful ways like worship, mentorship, and discipleship relationships. Often, generations tend to “clump” together in services, classes, activities and programs that are aimed specifically to their needs and desires. And while not a lot of research has been done in churches regarding the underlying structures that perpetuate age segregation, quite a bit has been done in the larger society.

You see, lack of generational connectivity isn’t unique to the church. In fact, the term “generation gap” was created to describe the widening gap of perceived differences between generations not in church but in society especially in regard to politics, social engagement, and cultural preferences.

But these effects have causes; it didn’t just happen. Which begs the question, “What structures are in place that helped cause or maintain these generational separations?

Well, I’m so glad you asked! Over the next few weeks, we are going to dive deep into some of the structures that are in place in society that have been researched and documented that help to perpetuate age segregation in our society. Not only will be look at each one individually, we will consider how these might apply to our own faith communities. After examining these structures, we will take some time to double down on the theological and biblical foundations that help us to examine our own practices in the light of these structures.

To get us started, here’s a brief overview of the structures that we will be examining together:

  1. Spatial Constructs – The way we use space, the elements we place in a space, and the design of a space are all contributing factors to what generations we will find in that space.
  2. Architecture – This is a big one! Believe it or not, architecture has had a huge impact on age segregation in Western cultures and that has been reflected in our own church buildings.
  3. Technology and Communication – Perhaps one of the most concerning structure that inhibits generational overlap is that of how we receive and transmit information. Technology platforms and communication venues have a huge impact on how generations interact with one another.
  4. Relational Constructs – Circles of relationship opportunities have narrowed so much in recent decades that a person is more likely to have close friendships with multiple ethnicities than with someone ten years older or ten years younger than oneself. While we can cheer the breaking down of racial and ethnic barriers, we need to consider how age and generational barriers are impacting our growth as human beings.

I have hesitated in starting this project for a number of reasons. First, blog series never do well in terms of readership. People prefer to read simple blog posts on singular hot topics than to dive deep into a more serious conversation on cause-and-effect. Which leads me to the second reason, these topics can’t be loosely dealt with or quickly brushed over. They took decades to come into being, years to research, and hours of study to understand; I hope to do them even the slightest justice in this online space. And finally, because these topics are just harder to write about. It takes time to research and present well and by placing these ideas in a public setting, it opens me up to criticism and critique.

However, so much of the information I’ve been seeing lately in my social media feeds and hearing in conversation with others is lacking this depth and research. It seems sensationalism and emotionalism are more eye-catching and easy to read than well-researched and thought-out explorations of real issues.

We need something more, especially in light of faith formation and the next generation. The Church needs to get serious about the things that are inhibiting us from sharing the love and light of Christ through the tools given to us by God; discipleship, mentorship and relationship.

So, even though this blog series won’t earn me likes and followers, I feel it is important to the work of the kingdom, so I must share as I feel called.

I hope that you will join me! Get ready to begin the work of critically examining our own hearts and actions as we discover those structures that work so hard to keep us apart from each other generationally. And then the fun really begins because, just like my son, we get to go back and re-work our code until the cause brings about the desired effect – going into all the world (even our own sanctuary) and making disciples of all mankind.


Ready to Start, Not Sure Where?

ReFocus Ministry is pleased to present a four-part webinar series on generational discipleship and connection for churches interested in exploring intergenerational ministry both in their church and in their homes. Each session will focus on a unique aspect of gathering generations together, both the challenges and opportunities, as well as practical tips to begin implementing now during this time away from regular church gatherings.

Sessions can be attended individually or all four can be attended as a series.

Session 1 – ReConnect. This first session of the webinar focuses on defining generations, generation gap, and the need for generational discipleship in your church. This is the “What” behind generational discipleship.

Session 2 – ReGenerate. This session focuses on the the research, the reasons, and the heart behind connecting generations from both a secular and spiritual viewpoint. This is the “Why” behind generational discipleship.

Session 3 – ReProduce. This session offers practical tips, strategies, and ideas to being connecting generations in your faith community and in homes in meaningful, lasting, life-changing ways. This is the “How” behind generational discipleship.

Session 4 – ReLease. It’s time to go and do! This session will provide a discussion and debrief around the questions, “What? So What? Now What?” and give you an starting point for incorporating generational discipleship as a meaningful part of your faith community. This is the “Who” behind generational discipleship at your church and in your home!

Anyone registered for all four sessions will receive a FREE half-hour coaching session/follow-up specific to your ministry needs.

To register, go to https://www.eventbrite.com/e/reconnect-a-webinar-for-generational-connections-tickets-116093734485. Questions? Feel free to email me at christina.m.embree@gmail.com. Can’t wait to journey with you!


For more information about

Check out to ReFocus Ministry or “like” our Facebook page. Join our conversation at theReFocus Family and Intergen Ministry group on Facebook.

About this Blog
The Embree Family

Refocus Ministry was started by Christina Embree, wife to Pastor Luke, mom to three wonderful kids, and church planter at Plowshares BIC. She also serves as the Minister of Generational Discipleship with the Great Lakes Conference of the Brethren in Christ.

With years of experience in family ministry and children’s ministry, she is passionate about seeing churches partnering with families to encourage faith formation at home and equipping parents to disciple their kids in the faith. She recently graduated with a Masters of Arts in Ministry focusing on Family, Youth and Children’s Ministry at Wesley Seminary, she also blogs at www.refocusministry.org and is a contributing blogger at D6 Family, ChurchLeaders.com, and Seedbed.

2 thoughts on “What’s Really Keeping Us Apart?

  1. Pingback: How Your Space Speaks: Who Is Welcome Where | r e F o c u s

  2. Pingback: Kids These Days | r e F o c u s

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